Today’s Sunday, right?– Boyfriend, Tuesday afternoon, Six Flags
SF Comedy Cellar
This my new favorite room in the city. It’s in the Tenderloin at 222 Hyde. I saw the cutest baby and a shoeless crackhead, they weren’t together though. Last night I worked on my “OMG, I’m so pretty” jokes. It’s the only thing that got a good laugh. I need to add on to it though and discuss my post-traumatic sex disorder. PTSD is best described as extreme...
So, this one time I cheated on my husband. Twice actually. But this specific time I’m talking about happened in the fall of 2008. I met this nerd in my world religions class in community college (always keeping it classy) and we went to some ghetto party in Daly City. I got drunk and stayed at his house and we made out. He wanted to fuck and I said, “I just met you” and he said,...
pappiness asked: when you gonna come fuck with the new parish on tuesday nights?
You’ve got to be good at words and grammar if you’re going to be a...– Mimi Vilmenay, on overcoming barrierrs
Brian just said “Poo Fighters”.
Boo Fighters is more like it
Julian is playing the new Foo Fighters album really loudly this morning to try to prove a point. He’s not going to win. My point is new Dave Grohl looks like an idiot when he waves his arm around in the air. I liked 1996 Dave Grohl way more. He was humble back then. (and their new music is disgusting. It’s dad rock, but not cool.)
Me: I need you to stop calling your sister "Dinah Vagina".
Vera: I don't think I can do that. (pauses, shakes her head) Nope. Don't think I can do that. I'm sorry, Mommy.
Oh my gosh! There’s a Chuck E. Cheese ticket in my pocket! This is the...– Vera, 5 years old
I don’t think I’ve had a boner outside of your house for quite...– Boyfriend, just now.
Waffles and titties
Oh my God. Who wears sweatpants at a strip club? I’ll tell you who. Me. Mimi. I’ve heard that there’s a waffle house in Portland* that features exotic dancers. I’m going to go there for breakfast in my sweatpants and feel really good about myself. Bridgetown Comedy Festival here I come! *just used the internet to look up the name of the club. It’s Acropolis Club...